HORROR MOVIE NEWS OF THE WEEK

But not necessarily "this week" because I'm always behind on this shit when it comes to updating my blog. So let's go with....HORROR MOVIE NEWS I'M SUPER DUPER EXCITED ABOUT!

What child doesn't remember reading Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark? It was like we were finally given really truly scary stories that didn't treat us like babies. I still find myself reading some of the stories now as an adult. And although they don't scare me, I can sit there going, man these were some fucked up things to be reading. Ya'll remember click click slide? That one gave me the major night terrors. And the gorgeous illustrations brought real horrific images to go along with us as we closed our eyes at night. All I want is a bunch of them framed in my home. I could probably manage that if I put a bit of effort into them. I'm going to go hunt down the books on amazon....

Anyway, the reason I'm rambling on about them is because one of my favorite directors of all time who may have also been cursed by a gypsy because he has the worst luck ever (I still believe in you Pacific Rim 2) is working with CBS Films to develop these stories into a film. Guillermo del Toro has once again come to save the day and flip my world upside down.

Guillermo tweeted this great pic the other day confirming the too good to be true news:

"I start development on a film based on a favorite book of youth: Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark!"

Thank you, kind Prince, for giving us the horror we deserve.
The books first came out in 1984 and were quickly banned for being "too scary". They were written by Alvin Schwartz and illustrated by Stephen Gammell. They came in a trilogy; Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, More Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, and Scary Stories 3: The Ghost Dimension (jk...More Tales to Chill Your Bones).

If you read this blog, you know my love for Kevin Smith goes deep and untainted. He can do no wrong in my eyes and I make no apologies for my love for him. So if you feel the need to bitch about Kevin Smith to me, just move along. You'll never change my mind. In fact, me and Mitch are going to ask him to officiate our wedding in the future. That's how much of a Kevin Smith fan I am.

Sundance was this weekend and fat Kev Smith released upon the world (of Utah) his new movie Yoga Hosers. Which is the second film in his True North Trilogy (up next is Moose Jaws). It stars his gorgeous daughter Harley Quinn and Johnny Depp's daughter Lily-Rose Depp. Remember those two cuties? They played clerks in Tusk? Well they've got their own spin off movie. Colleen and Colleen are two teenagers from Winnipeg who get invited to a senior party by the hottest guy at school but the Colleens accidentally uncover an ancient evil buried beneath the convenience store where they work and plans go out the window.

Kev said he wanted to write this movie for 16 year old girls, who needed heroes they could relate to. Which I think is damn sweet. It stars Michael Parks, Justin Long, Haley Joel Osment and Genesis Rodriquez who were all in the first movie, Tusk. It also stars Ralph Garman and Tony Hale and many more (including Johnny Depp). Oh, and of course Jason Mewes is in it. Snootch to the booooootch.

We still don't have a trailer, but we do have a clip, and it's over the top goodness that I expect from Kevin Smith. Youtube won't let me embed for some reason so just CLICK HERE

Next up is the very recent news that Fox has ordered a pilot for The Exorcist based on the novel by William Blatty (which I read last year, and if you delve deep enough on here you could probably find a review, but spoiler alert....it was awesome and you should read it). And of course, that book inspired the absolute classic film released in 1973 by the same name.

The one hour pilot will be a modern reinvention (boooooooo....I know) of the book which tells the story of two men facing one horrific demonic possession of a very sweet little girl. The pilot was written by Jeremy Slater who will also executive produce. He was behind The Lazarus Effect.

I don't know how this will work in the hands of Fox, it would be better off with HBO or FX. Weirdly enough, I'm going to watch the new The Omen modernization and use that as judgment for The Exorcist. Which is totally unfair. But I never said it was logical.

And last, but hopefully not least, The Boy was released in theaters on the 22nd and the reviews are mixed but mostly positive so far. I can't wait for it to come to itunes so I can watch it and not have to go outside into society.

The Boy stars the stunningly beautiful Lauren Cohan in a silly sounding story that actually comes off incredibly creepy. Greta takes a job as a nanny in a small English village. Sounds all good, except for the fact that the 8 year old she's babysitting is a life sized doll that the parents treat as a real child. They have a very long and strict list of rules that we know Greta will break one by one and bring a nightmare to life.

Here's the trailer:

To me, it looks like a good, solid horror movie from a big studio. I'm thinking along the lines of Sinister and Insidious. Good old fashioned scares, maybe a twist or two, and one more creepy doll to add to my home when they release the figure to the public.

Alright, that's it for me tonight. I should go help Mitch make dinner because I'm starrrrrving. The X-Files premiered on Sunday night so look out for my review soon.

Stay spooky!!