Creep - a break down - and ten reasons i hate aaron

I watched Creep! Let's talk about it!

Creep, originally titled Peachfuzz, is a movie from 2014 directed by Patrick Brice, written by Brice himself and Mark Duplass. It also stars the two guys. Duplass has been in a lot of great movies including Safety Not Guaranteed and The Lazarus Effect.

Total random pick on Netflix, knew nothing about it, just liked the synopsis. Let's break it down -

SPOILERS AHEAD

Starts out with a man named Aaron responding to some sort of ad in the middle of a small mountain town. But let's just take a moment here though to talk about how WE SHOULD NEVER RESPOND TO MYSTERIOUS ADS. Ya'll need to have a come to jesus moment. Stop answering sketchy ads on craiglist cause ya'll gonna get murdered. The internet is a great and wonderful place. Especially for catfishing and murdering people.

Aaron arrives at the house to find no one. But soon after the man who wrote the ad, Josef, shows up and seems hella friendly. But like creepy friendly. But like also I think anyone who is really friendly is creepy because humans make me uncomfortable. So I'm not the best judge of character.

Turns out Josef has a brain tumor and only has three months to live. So he has asked Aaron to film him all day so that Josef's unborn son (Joseph calls him Buddy) can have a memory of his father after Josef dies. Makes sense. I'm feelin' that.

This is when things get weird. Not only is Josef super friendly, creepily so, he's also a hugger. Which I despise. I seriously would've been out of there in 5 minutes. BUT Aaron is obviously more socially concious than me so he sticks arond. Josef immediately hops into the tub naked and starts to explain to Buddy how Josef and his father used to have "Tubbies".

Tubbies - Taking a bath with your dad which seems totally normal but probably isn't.

Using a wash cloth which he pretends is Buddy, Josef reenacts a "tubby'. Creepy shit. Also doesn't make any sense. If Buddy is watching this I'm guessing he'd have to be at a certain age where he could understand what was happening - which means he is waaaay too old for a tubby. Josef also pretends to drown himself and then appologizes for his weird sense of humor. Which i get on a spiritual level.

Then he has this weird moment where he gets extremely depressed about how he's going to die, while lying in a tub surrounded by candles...naked. Poor Aaron.

The two men decide it's time to head outside and after a bizarre dance and song from Josef while wearing a wolf mask, they continue on. They trek into the woods to find the myth of the healing waters but Josef, true to character, decides to run off and then jump out and scare the shit out of Aaron and proceeds to tell him he just felt his first near death experience.

Josef you are crazy mother fucker. And I'm starting to like you.

There's an interesting moment where Josef asks, "When you saw that axe outside my house, was there a small part of you that thought I'd kill you?" he says with a shit eating grin. And you just get this small glimpse into this complex character where he's simultaneously asking this question honestly but also to fuck with Aaron.

They find the Healing Waters and have a small moment of tranquility where the two of them get along and enjoy themselves in the water. It's almost more bizarre than the weird parts of the film. It shows how no matter how weird and off someone may be, if you find something small in common, or experience something slightly profound together, it creates a strange bond. And I think this moment of tranquility guides all of Aaron's actions going forward. Humanity is weird.

After a pancake meal and sharing of "shame" stories which Aaron takes seriously and Josef gets weird about (seeing a trend here), they head back to Josef's house. It's getting late, Aaron is trying to leave but Josef, with his strange charm manages to convince Aaron to stay for a drink.

And now things start to unravel - Aaron continues to try to leave, Josef steals his keys, Josef shares a horrifying story about his wife looking at animal porn, to which he decides to break into her bedroom wearing a wolf mask and rape her....

Aaron, to his credit, is pretty calm still but starting to freak. To get out of this increasingly alarming situation he drugs Josef with some Benadryl. Josef passes out and his cell phone rings. Aaron answers to find Josef's wife on the phone, Angela. She tells Aaron in a very bored and annoyed voice to get out of the house immediately, which is probably how I would sound too if my husband was a serial killer. So exhausting.

BUT WAIT PLOT TWIST

Angela is Josef's sister, not his wife. Which....duh. Josef is clearly a liar if you've been paying attention. But now this mother fucker, instead of hanging up the phone and running out of that damn house - decides to go look for Josef, who is no longer sleeping where he left him. HE GOES LOOKING FOR HIM. This is the defining moment of my strong belief that Aaron deserves everything that's coming for him.

Idiot.

Our time in the house ends when Aaron finds Josef in a wolf mask. Oh, also he's growling. And gyrating. He attacks Aaron and the camera goes black.

But next Aaron is safe and at home and tells us that Josef let him leave but has since videotaped himself dragging three garbage bags up a hill and then digging a giant hole. Which means, Josef knows where Aaron lives.

But Aaron, continuing to be an idiot, does nothing but throw the tape in the garbage. WHY DIDN'T YOU GO TO THE POLICE AARON. WHY???? YOU HAVE HOURS OF PROOF THAT THIS MAN IS CRAZY.

Aaaron then receives a box and during an un-boxing video we find out inside is a knife, a stuffed wolf and a DVD. The DVD is Josef apologizing for the previous video and encouraging Aaron to release his inner wolf by cutting open the stuffed wolf. Because duh. Inside is a locket with a picture of Aaron and a picture of Josef. And let me just say, my boyfriend has never bought me jewelry so Aaron should at least be a little flattered.
But instead Aaron finally does what he should've done the night he left Josef's place - he calls the cops.

Who do nothing.

Because it's a horror movie and I need to lower my expectations of logic. But in the police's defense, Aaron did not give a very convincing argument.

Next Aaron wakes up from a nightmare to hear a noise outside his house. He panics and runs around looking for the noise (we've all been there - mine is usually every other night) while we see Josef standing at the door looking in. Aaron then goes outside, to just reaffirm the idea that he's a total idiot.

We then see Aaron sleeping while Josef cuts hair from his head. But apparently Aaron doesn't re-watch his footage, because the next day he's freaked out that there's a DVD sitting in his window. Instead of being freaked out that he caught Josef on tape CUTTING HIS HAIR.

The DVD is Josef's last communication. He asks Aaron to meet him the next day so that he can apologize in person and so they can get some closure together. And I'm getting flashbacks from a really bad breakup 6 years ago. 

And in case I hadn't convinced you that Aaron is an idiot just yet........he decides to meet up with Josef. Clearly he has not watched enough episodes of Dateline in his life.

Aaron arrives to the meeting place, convinced he's fine because not only is he taping the whole thing, he has 911 on speed dial. But lbr, what will that accomplish? If Josef is coming at you with an axe, he's not going to wait 15-20 minutes for the cops to show up. 

Speaking of an axe - that's exactly what Josef brings. Wearing a wolf mask, he sneaks up behind Aaron and chops him right in the head.

And you know what Aaron, you deserved it, I'm sorry but literally every move you made in this film was wrong. You are the worst.

So finally it cuts to Josef watching the footage of him murdering Aaron. He speaks about how Aaron never turned around, which shows that Aaron trusted Josef. But mostly shows that Aaron is an idiot. Josef then drops the bomb that he "loves Aaron the best of all of them." Oh Josef, you crazy son of a bitch.

And so it comes to a close. Josef's cell phone rings, he answers with his new name, Bill, and confirms the visit of another sad schmuck who hasn't learned that answering ads on cragislist is a dumb idea. He then places the tape of Aaron's murder into a cupboard filled with a whoooooole lot more tapes.

So we've come full circle.

Amazing.

END OF SPOILERS

I absolutely adored this movie. It was a super fun ride, really quick, super impressive. The fact that there's only two cast members who carry the entire movie yet pull it off flawlessly. I already want to watch it again and I'm definitely going to aggressively recommend it. 

10/10 (except for Aaron, he gets 1/10)

In other news, I have a sunburn - which proves I went outside! It's also Friday night which means I have no pants on and am going to watch horror movies allllllll night long baby yeaaaah. Mitch gets home on Sunday and I will return to sanity.

Horror Movie Monday - The Canal Review

I watched The Canal! Let's talk about it!

This has been on my watch list for awhile now after randomly discovering the trailer and losing my mind that I'd never heard of it before. Finally a year later, Netflix got it, and I watched the shit out of it on Monday night.

The Canal is an Irish horror film which only meant that I needed subtitles on. Written and directed by Ivan Kavanagh and starring Rupert Evans - neither of which I had heard of before this. Evans' character David moves into a new home with his pregnant wife, we skip forward a few years, now he has a young son and his wife is a hussy.

The beautiful little house he lives in has a canal behind it and the house itself is 100 years old. So obviously spooky shit goes down.

SPOILERS FOR THE FILM IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT

The story really begins the night David witnesses his wife having an affair with a guy who looks vaguely like Khal Drogo if you squint. David runs as most people do in films when they see their significant other having an affair (which btw....I would not do. I would storm in there and create THE most dramatic scene I possibly could. It would be incredibly satisfying and I would hope to flip at least one table) down the path by the canal, he then starts to profusely vomit and runs into the creepy public toilet.

But he's not alone in the toilet. A spooky looking man, who we can only assume is a ghost based on his weirdo body movements, whispers something into David's ear, which makes him vomit more (fair enough - I'm not entirely sure ghosts would have good smelling breath) and then he stumbles home.

PANIC! His hussy wife doesn't come home that night, or the next morning, or the next day. So obviously we're all gonna assume gurl got hella murdered.

In comes the detective who I feel on a spiritual level when he constantly suffers from acid reflux and suspicion in general. He straight up tells David that he knows David murdered his wife and he's basically just going to try and prove it. Perfect timing - that's when the police find the wife's body in the canal.

Then things slowly start to unravel. David's sanity starts to crack and he starts to see ghosts around the home, he becomes convinced that a ghost murdered his wife - even after the coroner determines the death an accident. He delves into researching the house (as an archivist, this is super easy for him) and discovers that for a 100 years this little house has got one hell of a past. From multiple violent murders to some satanic rituals, ya know - the usual. (also this is my dream - move into a house - weird shit happens - investigate history of the house - BOOM SATAN WAS RAISED HERE)

Everyone around him is starting to get scared of him as he's acting a little cray cray. And after locking the Nanny in the closet after he's convinced a ghost tried to rape her (bear with me here) the police get involved again. Now they're keeping a verrrry close eye on him.

One of my favorite things about this movie (and this may just be my experience with the film) was that I really trusted David. All the way 'till the end I really did believe his ghost theory and the evidence he uncovers is extremely convincing.

The second favorite thing is when David discovers that by using a very old film camera to film parts of his house and the canal, he picks up ghosts on film. These lead to some of the absolute creepiest moments of the film.

So finally, after what feels like an hour of ramping up to this one moment, David's coworker comes by and he shows her the ghost footage. In a clever little trick, the film maker shows you what David sees...then shortly after shows you what the coworker sees....which is David murdering her (so technically she doesn't see much, she's too busy choking to death). Then everything speeds up extremely as David, trying to escape from the police, runs through the tunnels underneath his house which lead to the canal and starts to realize he was the murderer all along. He murdered his wife, he tried to hurt the Nanny, and he murdered his coworker.

He drowns in the canal but his son survives this whole ordeal. The Grandma takes the son into her care and puts the house up for sale but before leaving for his Grandma's house the boy needs to grab his dinosaur book from the house because dinosaurs. When inside the house by himself he hears David talking to him from the walls, David whispers something into the kid's ear and then the kid leaves the house WITHOUT THE DINOSAUR BOOK. The goddamn nerve.

In a shock induced ending, the little boy is in the back seat of his Grandma's car as they drive away from the cursed home. Until, psyche, the little boy opens the door and throws himself out of the car to his death. CREDITS.

END OF SPOILERS (also basically the end of the blog post sooooooo)

The movie did feel a little long? Might just be me. But I remember near the end I actually paused it just to see how much was left.

I really enjoyed the creep factor, the ghosties, the camera footage, and I loved the "shock" ending. But when David starts to lose his sanity a little, things drag on quite a bit. WE GET IT DAVID, you're seeing ghosts, lets wrap things up.

I would recommend it for sure. But I would recommend it only if you were in the mood for a slower build horror film with a lot of story and almost no jump scares. It's more the imagery and the story that haunt you when it's all over.

7/10

Ash vs Cooties vs Red Dragon (it's pronounced Fronkonsteen)

Another year, another San Diego Comic Con I am not attending. Alas, I spent the weekend lying on the couch binge watching Glee and Happy Endings. My life gets reallllll light hearted comedy sometimes ya'll.
But, while making sure I roll over every few hours on the couch to avoid bed sores, I have been following along with the many updates pouring out of Comic Con. And there are MANY things to get rowdy about...

• Margot Robbie's already obviously flawless performance as Harley Quinn
• Suicide Squad in general (sorry B v S, no one currr)
• THE STAR WARS PANEL
• The Star Wars behind the scenes reel (IS THIS EVEN REEL IDEK IM DEAD)
• Harrison Ford
• Nerdist presents Comic Con the musical
• Amazing cosplay
• Deadpool
• I mentioned Star Wars right?

BUT
On the horror spectrum, we got some great news coming out between the cracks, so let's talk about it:

First up

Victor Frankenstein! A new Frankenstein movie that doesn't include the old school Frankenstein monster and can make everyone forget about the travesty that was I, Frankenstein. I mean, really, WHAT WAS THAT?! Daniel Radcliffe and the director Paul McGuigan sat down with Jessica Chobot at the Conival and shared a few tid bits about the movie. Most importantly....there will be more than one monster!! Radcliffe also shares about his experience working as a character with a disfigurement. You can check out the panel here .
Victor Frankenstein stars James McAvoy as Frankenstein, and Daniel Radcliffe as Victor Igor. Written by Max Landis, the movie is told from Igor's perspective and watches the transformation of Victor into the mad scientist we lost along the way in film history. It's released on November 25th of this year.

(never forget)

We also got more details on Crimson Peak, and apparently they had a super cool virtual reality tour of the house. Which, btw, they built specifically for this film with working elevators!! Guillermo del Toro can literally do no wrong, you sweet horror loving prince. He also sat down with the Nerdist podcast which hopefully we can hear soon. Also, Guillermo announced he would be turning his movie into a maze at this years Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios Hollywood. So ima need someone to film a walk through please and thanks.
Crimson Peak is a "gothic romance horror" set in a creepy ass mansion in England during the 19th century. It has an amazing cast including Tom Hiddleston, Jessica Chastain, and Charlie Hunnam.
Check out the trailer here

Next up we got lots of goodies for a movie I am incredibly excited about.....my alter ego; KRAMPUS!!!
This is billed as a horror comedy all about the horrifying story of Krampus, a german folk lore about a demon like figure that goes after children who have been bad. And instead of pulling toys out of his sack for them, he puts them in it.

He's the best.
Krampus was all set up at Comic Con giving us a little glimpse of what Krampus could possibly look like. You can view the images here
The movie stars an amazing cast including Adam Scott and Allison Tolman. It will be released on December 4th.

This weekend was also all about the boomstick baby! That's right, I'm talking about Ash vs Evil Dead - the new series hitting Starz on Halloween this year. We got a trailer, we got a panel, we got a tone of images.
Basically it was a great weekend to be Ash.
And you know, I think we're in good hands here. The trailer was the perfect amount of humor, ridiculousness, creepy images, and SO MUCH GORE. YES BITCH. Once I'd finished the trailer I had to pinch myself to make sure I hadn't just had a fan dream. I'm not even going to bother to explain what this show is about. I mean, the title kind of tips you off?
Also, side note, if you ever get a chance to see Bruce Campbell in person, please fucking do it. I went to his panel two years ago here at the Vancouver Fan Expo and I peed a tiny bit from laughing so damn hard. That man is an entertainer and a charmer to the utmost.
Bloody Disgusting posted the entire panel here
And you can watch the trailer here
(side note - i just stopped typing to watch the trailer again, it's perfect)

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Obviously, we were all deeply saddened when we learned of Hannibal not being renewed after their third season. But honestly, I'm shocked we got this far. That show is just too niche I think, and those crime scenes.....every single one I just sit there yelling HOW WAS THIS ALLOWED ON TV THIS IS AMAZING. I'm looking at you - eye collage of dead bodies. But, we can thank our lucky stars that at least we have a season three and the return to film of one of my personal favorite evil fictional characters of all time - Francis Dolarhyde aka the tooth fairy aka the red dragon.
And he's played by Richard Armitage which is going to give me some weird Thorin/Dolarhyde fantasies that I am not ready for.
So while Amazon and Netflix passed on bringing Hannibal back to life, during Comic Con we were told there could be a possible movie. Showrunner Bryan Fuller revealed that a movie isn't exactly out of the cards. "We're looking at the possibility of a feature".
And that's all we need to keep on believing in Hannibal.
They also released a trailer sharing A LOT more of Richard's portrayal of Dolarhyde and my body is ready. (seriously....this thing is 6 minutes long) ALSO ZACHARY QUINTO!!!!!!!!!!! EYEBROWS!!!!!!!!
Check it out here

And last but not least, Cooties was screened for some lucky attendees of comic con and I was super jealous. A new horror zombie comedy that speaks to my soul as not only is it children zombies...but they contact the virus by eating tainted chicken nuggets.
Like
Did I write this script and not remember?
The film stars Elijah Wood, Jack McBrayer and marks the return to horror of Rainn Wilson.
Check out the trailer here
And watch Elijah Wood's ten minute panel when he sits down with Chris Hardwick at Conival and talks about Cooties and horror movies in general. Check that out here

Alright,
That's it from me. I'm still trying to re-brand here, as if anyone notices, but that's why I'm not updating as much. Also I went through a horror movie dry spell. But I'm back on track. Mitch leaves for Edmonton tomorrow and I have a week to occupy myself which means horror movies all night long while camping out on the couch. I live wild, I know.  

horror news and fan expo vancouver

Upcoming things I am thrilled about:

The Woods Movie

A documentary on the making of The Blair Witch Project. The festival trailer is out for this exciting documentary that will reveal footage from the hundreds of hours of footage that was taken during the filming, and compacted into an interesting and tell all documentary. The movie that changed the genre of horror and broke the box office is still such a big secret. Not much is really known about the making of and the actors themselves mostly vanished. And now we get to see all the behind the scenes goodies that we love.

Watch the trailer here

There's also a rumour floating around out there, reported by Bloody Disgusting, that there's a new Blair Witch movie being discussed behind closed doors. Could be a reboot? Could be a remake? Either way it's the stupidest thing I've ever heard and you bet your ass I'm gonna watch it just like Book of Shadows (*muffled groaning*).

The Gift

This movie has got me excited. I love a good creepy, high production thriller/horror and this one looks like a winner. A young married couple encounter an old friend who soon becomes a part of their lives even though they don't want him to. And when the husband remembers what really happened in the past with him and this creep, things get cray. The trailer is really good, and I'm really judgmental of trailers, but this one passed. And we got a bunch of new posters that look creepy as hell.

Watch the trailer here

Starring Jason Bateman, Joel Edgerton and Rebecca Hall opening in theaters July 31st. 

Sinister 2

 FINALLY THINGS ARE COMING OUT!! Jesus, I was getting so mad. This movie is due out in August and yet we had nothing until last week when everything just spilled out of the woodwork. We got some promo photos, we got a teaster trailer, and now we finally have the first full length trailer. Although, tbh, I'm not loving it? But I'll still watch. It's just something about the trailer seems off and I have a gut feeling this will completely fall apart which will be devastating. Maybe it's because Sinister didn't really need a sequel? And the way it all ties up to the first movie doesn't make any sense?
Regardless, I'm excited to finally get some news about the sequel - bad or good.

“In the aftermath of the shocking events in Sinister, a protective mother and her 9-year-old twin sons find themselves in a rural house marked for death as the evil spirit of Buhguul continues to spread with frightening intensity.”

Watch the trailer here

Afterlife with Archie

This comic book series is amazing!! And this is old news, but I finally got around to reading it. I'm about half way through. The art is to die for, the story is spot on, and watching the characters of my childhood die and turn into zombies is so weirdly satisfying. You can buy the entire volume at your local comic book store or online at comixology. It's written by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa and the art is by Francesco Francavilla. It was inspired by a zombie-themed variant cover which Francavilla did himself. One of the best parts is at the end of each issue they put in an old school horror comic that's almost as fun to read as the original story itself.

Leatherface

Let's talk about this prequel! I was over the moon when they announced it awhile ago and the more news that comes out, the more excited I'm getting. I love the idea of this!

Here is the rumored plot according to bloody disgusting:

The film centers around a violent teen who one day will become Leatherface. He escapes from a mental hospital with three other inmates, kidnaps a young nurse and takes her on a road trip from hell. Along the way, they are pursued by an equally deranged lawman out for revenge.

We've got some cast news and lots and lots of rumors. But this project has a lot weighing on it and I hope the team is ready for the judgment coming their way. 

31

A new Rob Zombie film! I'm a huge Rob Zombie fan and was devastated awhile ago when he said he was going to stop doing horror. But JK YA'LL, he's back. And this movie looks like it'll be gorier than all the others combined. It was kickstarted and completely fan funded which i'm all about. The art that he shared to show how he envisioned it all going down has become some of my favorite art. It was seriously amazing.
They've just finished filming and we've been given a slew of news including casting and a few photos.
Cast wise we've got: Jeff Daniel Phillips, Malcolm McDowell, Judy Geeson, David Ury to name a few and of course Sheri Moon Zombie.

“31 follows five carnival workers who are kidnapped the night before Halloween and held hostage in a large secret compound known as Murder World.
Once there, they have 12 hours to survive a terrifying game called 31 in which ‘The Heads’- murderous maniacs dressed as clowns – are released to hunt them down and kill them.” - bloody digusting

Follow all the news over at Rob's site Rob Zombie Official

Kill-Crazy Nymphos Attack!

Daniel Way has teamed up with my main girls, the Soska twins to kick start this amazing comic book series. It was originally supposed to be a film but I think it's a great move to create a comic book instead. It's the story of a disgusting pervert who creates a drug that makes women have an uncontrollable lust for sex but ultimately turns against him when they also have an uncontrollable lust...for killing.
I funded this project and have been getting constant updates about this series and I suggest ya'll do the same because this is going to be phenomenal. They've already surpassed their goal but are still accepting money to make this as amazing as they can. Everything the Soska twins touch turns to bloody and demented gold.

Check out the project here

FAN EXPO!
Fan Expo was last weekend and it was a total blast! The only dissapointment was that Rue Morgue wasn't there this year and neither was the Festival of Fear so the lack of horror was depressing. I rocked my Jason Vorhees jersey on Saturday and all together I'd say there was maaaaybe 7 people cosplaying as horror icons? Hopefully next year they bring back the horror element, but I'm also considering attending the horror convention in Calgary next summer so maybe I'll get my fix that way.
One guy was cosplaying as Jason Vorhees and I got so freakin excited I ran up and embraced him:
(warning....you're about to see my face :O)

So mad props to that guy!!!!!!!!! He also had Michael and Freddy with him too but Jason's my bae.

Leanna Vamp was also there who is an amazingly beautiful cosplayer, model, and youtube personality (see Star Wars Girls). She works with horror block and is a big promoter of all things horror. She was absolutely wonderful and kind and made my day.

Right now me and Mitch are house sitting for my co worker and taking care of two dogs, plus our little guy, and two cats. It's a mad house over here but it's entertaining.

Horror Documentaries and Buttholes (full disclosure; there are no buttholes in this post)

For the horror fan, simply watching horror movies is never enough, you always need more more more. So when I'm in a horror movie lull or can't make up my mind - I like to pull up a chair and watch how my favorites were made, or watch the history of this amazing genre. Here's a few classics that I watch frequently:
(and "His name was Jason" isn't on here because... I HAVEN'T WATCH IT YET OMG I KNOWWWW - i'm terrible, but I found a copy on youtube soooo....[you can actually find all these docs on youtube])

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Silence of the Lambs - the inside story

I think this was made for the E! network before it played nothing but reality shows, i'm not sure, but it has that feel to it. But regardless it's a well made interesting look into the movie that almost didn't get made but ended up winning the top 5 Oscars of that year. The doc explains how Gene Hackman originally bought the rights but backed out, and how Anthony Hopkin's was convinced his role in Hollywood was over until this ground breaking role came along.

It's quite an intimate look at the goings on with the studio at the time and what seems to be everyone having zero faith this movie would ever be made.

Well, Clarice - have the lambs stopped screaming?

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Never Sleep Again: the elm street legacy

If you're a Freddy fan - you've already seen this a few times. A great, in depth look at the franchise itself, the creators, director, actors/actresses, and everything in between. It has some great behind the scene footage and photos.
And this guy is FOUR HOURS LONG and hosted by our main queen Nancy (Heather Langenkamp). I mean, horror documentaries always deliver, and this is almost too much, you're basically like WE'RE NOT WORTHY.
It starts with the original film and finishes with my all time fav Freddy vs. Jason, covering each film with enough time and respect.

When I was alive, I might have been a little naughty, but after they killed me, I became something much, much worse. The stuff nightmares are made of.

Scream Still Screaming: the ultimate scary movie retrospective

I'm a massive massive MASSIVE fan of the Scream series and this doc really does it justice. It talks about the history of the script, how it was originally called Scary Movie, and how it became a trilogy (obviously made before the fourth was released). It also touches on the backlash that came with it because of the teen violence and how Wes Craven realllly didn't want to do it.
I mean, this whole movie was doomed from the get go, especially being released during the Christmas season, but it kicked ass and continues to. YES, EVEN SCREAM 4 YOU JERKS.
Everyone is in this film from Neve Campbell to Matthew Lillard, Jamie Kennedy and Parker Posey etc.
And try and get to the end without turning on Scream.
 
Now Sid, don't you blame the movies. Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!

A History of Horror with Mark Gatiss (three part series)

This is a documentary on horror movies in general, starting from the very first and ending with Halloween. It was a three part series made for the BBC by writer and actor Mark Gatiss (from Sherlock and an avid horror fan himself) where he takes a personal exploration through the history of horror movies. Each episode is an hour long. Episode one "Frankenstein Goes to Hollywood", Episode two "Home Counties Horror" and ending with Episode three "The American Scream".
This is a really wonderful doc to watch if you're a huge horror fan, and Mark does justice to the horror genre by treating it respectfully and fairly. I remember the first time watching this one I ended up with a two page list of movies I NEEDED to watch or re-watch. 
Mark also sits down with some of horror's legends and shares old footage that I'd never seen before.

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The American Nightmare 

This is a hella dark documentary that pairs horror movies with the horror going on in the world. It includes some of the biggest names in horror like Romero, Cronenberg, Carpenter, Hooper, Craven etc and they share the very honest inspirations that came for their films. While showing some of the more gruesome scenes from the movies, they cut it with gruesome scenes from every day life, specifically the Vietnam war which inspired many directors and the civil rights movement. It's definitely not for the faint of heart, and is quite graphic, but I'm not sure why I'm even telling you that considering you wouldn't be reading this blog or seeking out this doc unless you had that sick mind all of us horror fans cherish.
This one is honestly just fascinating to watch for someone who wasn't born when all of this happened, and it gives me a chance to start to understand the true darkness of these films.

the exorcist that haunted a maze.....idk...titles are the worst

Allergy season has arrived. I had three months of glorious snot free fun but it's all over and the hell begins. Which means spring is here - rain and sun alternatively every 5 minutes for an entire month, and all the pollen you could dream of. And that means I stay indoors, more than usual, and read a lot of books while ignoring the sun streaming through the window, and watch horror movies. So this post is brought to you by pollen - an introverts great excuse to not "hang out" for 9 months. 

What I've been reading lately:

aka I'm on a good book roll and I'm gonna brag about it

The Exorcist

First of all...wtf is on the cover? This is the exact cover I have and every time I put the book down I would just stare uselessly at the cover going WHAT IS IT?! WHY IS THIS THE PHOTO THEY CHOSE?
Second of all....I've owned this book for six years and am livid with myself for not reading it six years ago.
I'm not going to explain the plot to you because you must've been living under a rock not to have heard about it. Young girl gets possessed - says some crazy shit - girl gets an exorcism - people die - everything's fine.
As phenomenal as the movie is, the book is even better. Especially the scenes where the adults view Regan, it's honestly horrifying and disgusting and captures the imagination in the worst ways. You become attached to the priests a lot more in the book, and the background characters are far more developed and lovable. I highly recommend reading unless you are currently possessed in which case maybe you shouldn't because you might get ideas.

Also on goodreads if you go to the page for this book, someone asked the question "is it scary, i'm going to read it to my 5 year old?" and I'm not entirely convinced that I didn't write it from the future.

The Maze Runner - series

A young adult series! So original!
But seriously, every fucking YA book I pick up and read seems to magically have 6 or 7 other books that follow it. Why can't ya'll just write one nowadays? Do young adults need 1000 book long series to fully understand what's happening?
BUT the Maze Runner and it's companions were actually super fun and one of the rare times I even bothered with an entire series (except a song of ice and fire - love you boo). They're also super quick reads because they are incredibly suspenseful and I may have stubbed my toes multiple times while reading and walking.
It's a post apocalyptic world...stay with me...where a disease released by the CDC has wiped out most of humanity....stay with me....and to find the cure they locked up a bunch of kids in a giant maze and made them try to survive....see? it was worth staying with me.
The maze is only in the first book but the kids continue on through trials and distrust and death and although I never fully understood the scientists logic, I bought it.
It's also a movie now! Which I watched half of before wandering off somewhere else. I'm determined to re-watch though.
Warning....there are only two female characters. Which kinda super sucks.

I Am Haunted

Ya'll know I love me some Ghost Adventures. It's probably one of my favorite TV shows and I believe every single second of it and I even watch all the spinoffs like Aftershocks and that one where other groups investigated while Zak looked gorgeous and paced back and forth judging them.
This is Zak's second jump into writing and I devoured his first book in about two days. The first one is more about how Ghost Adventures started, the science behind the paranormal, and some really interesting theories on residual spirits.
This one is more about the effects of ghost investigating, some personal tidbits about life after the success of the show, and lots of juicy details about Zak's purchase of, and future documentary about, the demon house.
This book is basically only for people who give a shit about Ghost Adventures. The first one is way better to recommend to up and coming paranormal enthusiasts, but this is just straight up beautiful self indulgent Zak-ness. 

I am currently devouring The Silence of the Lambs. I started it yesterday morning and have barely been able to put it down since.

GO READ BOOKS YA FILTHY ANIMALS

stuff to buy and stuff and thangs

I have spent many hours dancing through the pages of Etsy, dreaming of all the things I would love to purchase. Then I wake up the next morning and close my shopping cart and it all becomes a distant memory.
BUT recently I made my first ever purchase off of Etsy for my cosplay for Fan Expo in three weeks and I was thrilled with how easy it all was. And it opened the flood gates.

Our house is a treasure trove of horror items from a Chucky doll, to multiple stuffed birds, to horror movie posters, a bottle of vampire blood etc etc but when it comes to flaunting my love of horror on my own body, I only have 1000+ t-shirts (exaggeration) to wear with pride. This is where Etsy comes into play. The shops and their creators have a endless supply of hair bows and necklaces and bags to show how much you really love horror.

Here are my favs:

First up:
These little displays that have little trinkets inside by etsy owner youmadewhat. They have a tone of them on there from zombies to vampires to obscure old horror movies and each little display is completely unique. I am OBSESSED with these and the toughest decision will simply be choosing just one. And honestly, they're pretty fairly priced for what you're getting.
Check 'em out here

IN LOVE with these bottle cap necklaces featuring all our favorite old school movie monsters. You can get all 7 for under $10. And there's 7! So you could wear a different one every day of the week...or all at once..WHO CARES..it's your choice. I will be purchasing these ASAP.
Check 'em out here

*insert clever Poe pun*
A one of a kind Poe necklace to hang around your neck from a crazy seller who has a lot of text on her or his page that I definitely did not read. The man himself, who is fudging nuts and whose writing terrified generations. Who better to have close to your tell-tale heart?! HA! I did it!
Check it out here

I've been a fan of this girls' shop for a few years, but have never bit the bullet and bought anything. Mostly because there's SO much to choose from. Most of her store is these amazing little pouches covered with amazing vintage horror photos like Vampira, Godzilla, Rocky Horror etc. She even does a JAWS one. I'm straight up obsessed.
Check her out here

And last but not least:

Show your love for your favorite horror guys by wearing them in your hair :D
I want all of these and I will probably never wear these because I don't think I could pull off bows? But I want them ANYWAYYYY. And they're super affordable at just over $10 and are completely custom made. So maybe you'd rather have Pinhead or Rick Grimes? This could be done.
Check 'em out here

Happy daylight savings day or whatever nerds! I've been sick for four days and feel like hot garbage but the sun is shining and the Monster is pouring and things could be worse. Have a great Sunday!